Monday, November 19, 2007

Investing – with your spouse

The age-old saying “Behind Every Successful Man, is a Woman” is true to its being. There is a synergy to balancing in which the Chinese believes in “Ying and Yang”. Some things just need a partner to go with and should not be left alone or separated like “fork & spoon”, “table & chair” (in French table is feminine while chair is masculine), “mortar & pestle”.

This adage is very true in the olden days and I dare say it is still true today except that I believe it works both ways now more than ever. Behind every successful man there is a woman, who can be a wife, a mother, a sister or a girlfriend and behind every successful woman there is a man; a husband, a boyfriend, a father or a brother. God created man to be stronger in physical sense while woman to be stronger emotionally. There is a good balance if we put both sexes together.

No matter how rich you are, no matter how big you have become in the corporate world, no matter how successful your business is, a man requires a balance that a woman can provide and vise versa. There must be the “ying yang” balance otherwise all the treasures you acquired will not have much meaning in your life.

“Two heads are better than one”. A lot of couples keep their money matters away from each other. Some to the point of lying of their expenses; some even lie or keep mum on their investments. I believe couples should share with each other the things they do.

1. Talk to your spouse

If you are suddenly motivated to put up a budget and to start an investing plan I would suggest you start by talking to your spouse. Let her or him know your thoughts. The first step is communication. By talking out loud your thoughts will prepare your spouse of any eventuality. No surprises up the sleeves.

2. Discuss with your spouse

If you are planning to invest so to retire early, put up a plan. Set your goals. List out the things you need change in order to achieve your goals. Before putting your plans into action, take time to discuss your action plans and goals with your spouse. Make it a fun project that you can do together.

3. Argue with your spouse

Yes, if you must, you should start arguing with your spouse before you put your plan into action. Argue and fight your hearts out. It is never easy living with another and it is never smooth sailing because 2 brains usually go different directions. Make adjustments to your plan to suit both your needs. Leave your disagreement behind. Do not take it to bed with you.

4. Agree with your spouse

After all the arguments and fights, come to a common goal where you both agree can work in a win-win situation for all. Be specific with your goals and put them down in writing. This will avoid any fights later on if things get rough.

5. Harmonise with your spouse

Form a strong alliance with your spouse so as to take your investing ideas to greater heights. List out the things each can do better and set out to conquer the investing world together. Make a pledge to work in harmony with each other.

6. Work in tandem with your spouse

Having a common goal with the same motivation will take couples who can work together to achieve their final goals faster and with better results. Working in tandem with each other may not be easy but it is possible. What both of you need is a determination to succeed.

If somehow your chain of momentum slowed or come to a halt, go back to rule # 1 and start all over again, start talking to each other and building your dreams once more. The more you practise at it, the better you will become and ultimately your path to successful investing will be a dream comes true.

If you ever notice the habits of the mandarin ducks, always swimming in pairs and toward the same direction, side by side and in great harmony. Nothing fluster them. Be like them.

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